“Sometimes I think of six impossible things before breakfast” -Alice in Wonderland (2009)
What to write? What to write? hmm the possibilities and nothing comes close to mind.
I wonder what it would be like to go as mad as a hatter? <– should I put that into quotation marks? I don’t want people to think I stole it or anything, it just popped into my head.
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I wish I had a better vocabulary. I wish my fingers would type what my mind is actually thinking. Word for word. And it doesn’t always happen that way. It kind of sucks. Like my vocabulary. Did anyone ever had to copy definitions from the dictionary in elementary school? It didn’t help much. I mean all it did was teach how to look up words in the dictionary…which I am still using to this day. Well at least I still use something from third grade unlike cursive. Well that’s actually not true, I use cursive to write on cakes. But that’s about it. I remember my third grade teacher always told the class “You need to learn how to use cursive because you will be using it for the rest of your adult life.” Well guess what this isn’t the decades before today anymore. I use print writing in my everyday life. The only teacher I can remember forcing students to utilize cursive was my U.S. History teacher my junior year of high school. I liked him.
I swear my fingers are dyslexic. Well my own version of what dyslexia is. I keep thinking “life” and my fingers type “like”. Maybe I should just blame my keyboard, and not the typer. I need an “easy” button. But then that would make life easier; maybe a little too easy. I like some complications, but not a whole lot. A life with some complications and very little drama.
Eleanor Roosevelt said, “Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people”. Hollywood seems a little small-minded to me. I always thought this, with “this starlet gained ten pounds” or so and so’s body before they lost the ten pounds. And honestly they looked beautiful with the extra ten pounds. They looked healthy. I know some people are naturally thin, and I totally understand and comprehend that. But when it is constantly shoved down the everyday peoples throats it gets brainwashed into our minds that in order to be beautiful we have to be a size negative zero. But where does your happiness go? I can’t believe where I am going with this and who I am about to mention here because I believe the attention she and her husband receives is a complete waste of time so to be fair to me I won’t mention her by name although I think it will be obvious. The star of the now ,thankfully, cancelled crappy “reality” tv show recently underwent major plastic surgery. She said she was doing this “for herself”. But her husband is a major douche bag (that’s me being nice), I think she did it more for the db. Isn’t funny that “douche bag” and “dead beat” have the same initials? I thought she was beautiful before him, before she began dating him. Now she looks like a crack whore. I heard on one of those television specials where they count down “The best/worst of “, and one of the interviewees said along the lines “plastic surgery is supposed to make you look better, make you feel better about yourself”. But does it really? It makes you seen like you want to look like a Barbie doll. And Barbie was a plastic broad who couldn’t seem to keep a job, and doesn’t have the “dream house” life with Ken anymore. “What don’t you like about yourself?” was the main punchline on the television show Nip/Tuck which was one of my favorite shows. But isn’t the little imperfections that we were born with makes us beautiful?
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It’s been almost ten days since I started this post. I hasn’t been that I have been neglecting it, it just I was either too tired to finish it. But here I am, tackling this, hopefully until I publish this baby.
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Here it goes, just for you Crys
SEX AND CANDY
yes it is a song. A song I have loved since I was ten. I probably shouldn’t admit that, or at least to the band. I blame VH1 and Mtv. When Vh1 and Mtv still played more music videos and less reality shows. But what I remember about the video is a spider which I am terrified of, that and clowns…and dolls that are named Chucky. But let’s not go there.
“Sex and Candy” was hugely popular in 1997. Since then I have only wondered what would a combination of the two smell like. What kind of candy? Would it be a hard candy (no gutter of awesomeness minds please, “Lets not get obscene” – Jackson Rathbone)? Or would it be a chocolately candy? And who would think oh wow it smells like sex and candy in here wow! Ok why would a ten-year old wonder how sex smells like? Oh lordie. That’s not what I meant. So lets not go there as this is turning into crap, and possibly illegal.
Odd facts of 1997: I wasn’t allowed to listen to the Spice Girls, My sister was highly obsessed with Hanson, and Titanic was released (which I saw 3 times = 12 hours of Leonardo DiCaprio)
Why is something as innocently as enjoying a lollipop candy deemed as something sexual. I mean unless you are going to town like Samantha Jones (Sex and the City) then {chuckle} no comment. But if you are just having a lollipop, I don’t get it. Is there an age limit for when you can stop enjoying a lollipop? A while back I was listening to my favorite radio morning show “Mark and Mercedes in the Morning” and Mercedes was telling a story that involved a woman friend of her was eating a big stick frozen popsicle like Samantha. And their producer made a statement “I think when a woman is having a sucker or popsicle she is teasing us men” or something along those lines. I’m sorry, but that is completely false. Now, if this woman is making some well noises then I can see it as a tease.
I am going to see Marcy Playground, Sponge, and Imagine Dragons this Thursday at the venue I shouldn’t name because I am still pissed at for the treatment of a certain band. (If you don’t know what I am talking about then read previous blog entry
100 Monkeys at the Hard Rock Cafe
If you do know what I am talking about then please don’t think of me as a hypocrite, as I am still, highly a Monkey Junky, but I am also supporting Imagine Dragons. Just to spite the venue I should wear my 100 Monkeys shirt.) I am still highly irked about that night. And I shall not spend a dime there, as the event is free. I hope the H2O is free, as I might get thirsty. One of the reasons I want to go back to that place is to look at the artifacts there. And take pictures because they do have interesting stuff there.
Like this —–>
Britney wore this!!
* I was highly excited when I walked past this display. This is the closest I have ever come across something Britney touch*
*These people are awesome, and I just don’t mean Imagine Dragons (iD).*
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“We are all prisoners here of our own device”
Now I am drawing a HUGE blank…yep.
This past Sunday, some customers apparently took a high dosage of stupidity. I think if someone asks a stupid question, you should be allowed to smack them onside their head. Here is one story:
I work in the bakery department of a grocery store. And a male customer asked my fellow co-worker if we had any more of a certain type of roll, she pointed him in the right direction to where they were located. Not five seconds later he came back over to the counter and held up the roll, bagless, and said, “I was hoping it would be bigger”. (That’s what she said!) And she replied, “that’s as big as they come.” Meanwhile, me and my other co-worker were looking at each other strangely because he walked away towards the front of the store still bagless. He came back, time number three, and asked if there was in fact a code, and the same co-worker asked if he wanted a bag for it. After he walked away, I told my co-worker, “when he commented on the size of it, you should have said, “that’s what she said”. But the winner of the stupidest question of that day goes to the lady who asked if the hot french bread was from that day!
When people act/say something idiotic I want to do this:
but I have to do this:
“There is no such thing as a stupid question” Whom ever said that, obviously never worked retail.
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3 Three Things I am in love with:
1. 100 Monkeys Swimsuit Calender
It’s hilarity at its best. I love these guys, not just because of their music but of their sense of humor and style. If you were of the smart ones and order this calendar you should consider yourself…smart.
2. LINKS, it’s a band not one of the things you click on. They are really awesome. www.linksband.com Favorite songs, “Testify” and “Under the Anchor”
3. Rosemary & Olive Oil Bread….so effing delicious and completely dangerous.
Song of the Day: One of my all-time favorite songs “Bittersweet Symphony” by The Verve
That is all for now,
Thanks for reading,
<3, J
